Breaking Down Brick Walls

Making the decision to fly to Canada for the holidays was a hard one. In some ways I worried about letting my readers down. I wasn’t ‘traveling’ constantly as others were and  some of my original plans changed after I made the choice to travel along the Silk Road, solo.

I’m really good a building brick walls. Within weeks of arriving in Canada my brain started to over-think just about everything. What was I doing? Am I doing enough on the blog? Do I need to do more? It was kind of  like an over-compensation kind of thinking. I started to withdraw and plan, think, worry etc. I started to worry that I wasn’t enough, which is something I have struggled with for many, many years. In fact, I would read other blogs, shut down my laptop and walk away. As you can probably guess, I am really good at submarining myself. Why am I telling you this? Well, I recently read a post by Sherry Ott about sharing what’s inside her head, which really struck me.

In the last year I have worked at being everything but myself, and in the process I’ve managed to close down in ways that I shouldn’t have. It’s a fine line. I kind of receded into myself to avoid noise. Yeah, that was not a smart move on my part. Silly me.

I’ve decided to make an effort to relax and be myself in 2012. I want to continue writing posts on tips, tricks, gear, advice and so on, but I also want to tell entertaining and inspiring stories. I want to find new ways to bring you along with me and help you feel as though you have as much of a part in this blog as I do. I know it will take some time, but I’m willing to put in as much time as I need to.

I’ve tried a lot of new things over the past 2 years. Some of them have worked and some have bombed. I love change, which is why I think I love travel so much, but sometimes too much change can be a bad thing. In 2012 I have some big trips planned, and I’ve committed to writing for a couple of other online publications. This means that making big changes will be hard. So, I’m just going to make a few additions (like weekly photo pots, more vlogs, and monthly guest posts).

I still worry about not doing enough and I struggle with sharing too much. I know this has probably hurt some people in the past year, and for that I apologize. In the next year I will be testing myself in more ways than one. My trips will push passed every boundary I have, and I plan to exceed my mental boundaries as well.

It’s not going to be easy. I’ll probably flail around a bit. I may even sink below the surface a couple of times. I’m not going to give up though. I’m going to push passed my physical and mental boundaries and hopefully come out on top in the long run.

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Travel doesn’t discriminate. Anyone can travel. You don’t need to cross the ocean to have real life experiences. You can have them in your own backyard if you’re open to them. Be fierce. Be spontaneous. Explore. Discover. Learn. Share. Repeat.